I am typing this in Ho Chi Min/Saigon Airport. I am heading to Cambodia for a week now. I am sad to leave my amazing tour mates. I also haven't killed Paul yet and we have officially been together for a year as of Thursday. The two of us had this amazing moment this morning where we realised that this was real - we honestly truly want to be together forever. I actually cried as it was very surreal. Until this moment I hadn't believed it but now I do. I want to be with him for the rest of my life, I want to share everything with him - my successes, my failures, my challenges, my happy moments, my horrible depressed moments.
I have also had realisations about myself - when you're touring you really discover who you are. I have discovered I am the girl who likes to party but not all the time, I am the girl who loves in depth discussions about culture, politics and other random stuff but needs alone time. I love my job, I love to write, love to eat and love to explore.
I also found out I should smile more as it lights up my face and makes me more approachable. It feels natural again to smile, for a long time it felt forced but Paul makes me smile for no reason. He lights me up when I am having a depressive mood.
I am proud. I am free. I will keep rereading this when I am down. I will remember the freedom and love I have right now. I can have it at home. I know I can.